Buddha once said that holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else, and then you’re the one who gets burned.
That’s a hot tip. And the key phrase, of course, is holding on. Because anger is one of those emotions that’s best invested, not ingested.
The challenge, then, is learning to unclench our fists. Allowing anger to serve as a roadmap to our real feelings.
In my experience, for example, anger is a signal that my boundaries have been trespassed upon. That somebody has crossed the line. That a violation or a betrayal has occurred, either self inflicted or otherwise.
And so, when my face feels like it can heat soup, and when my toes start to curl up under my desk, I view it as invitation to take action on my own behalf. To spell out precisely what the boundary violation might have been, and how to be an advocate for those needs in the future.
Why did this phone call make me so angry? What cherished part of me did this person just offend? And what deeply held values were called into question here?
These questions help me let go of the hot coal and light the way to understanding. They also provide me with massive ammunition to make new art.
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How many of your angry moods are you wasting?
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That Guy with the Nametag
Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.
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