Feedback is source dependent.
As encouraging as it is to hear your spouse or your friends or your parents or your colleagues sing your praises from the rooftops, deep down, you can’t help but remember that they have a significant vested interest in your success.
Their impression of your talents isn’t exactly an unbiased opinion.
And so, their feedback, no matter how complimentary it may be, rolls off you like water off a duck’s back. It blends into the background. Becomes the new normal. Simply part of your brain’s landscape.
On the other hand, if a person who isn’t obligated to love you begins verbalizing your strengths and expertise right back to your face, that’s a different story.
Because their feedback is complete and impartial. It comes from a source that has no personal stake or involvement in your success. Meaning, the results reported are a direct reflection of your actions and behaviors.
And the beauty is, that kind of feedback can change everything.
I remember periods of my life when I was feeling somewhat incapacitated to erect the pillars of my daily life. Hanging on by the slimmest threads of reality, starting to think I didn't understand the world or myself anymore.
And during those times, it was imperative to see signs that the universe was on my side. I would have three or four meaningful conversations with unbiased people who have given me solid faith in my own capabilities. Their healing words paved me like an avalanche of light.
It felt like I’ve been given a new way of momentum. Real breathing room for the first time in a long time.
That’s what’s possible when we believe the truth about ourselves, no matter how beautiful it is.
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Whom might you ask for feedback that will give you real ground to stand on?
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That Guy with the Nametag
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