Wednesday, July 01, 2015

An alien staring into the window of the party

I’ve always been a fiercely independent person. 

I love connecting and conversing and communing and carousing with people, and I cherish the centers of belonging in the different parts of my life, but on a traditionally sanctioned scale, I’m just not a joiner. I don’t have strong affiliation needs. Niches and scenes and cliques and teams and genres and circles and clubs and associations and tribes just aren’t appealing to me. 

And I’ve tried. I really have. My whole life I’ve made concerted efforts to join numerous groups, personally, professionally, spiritually and otherwise. But none of those things truly clicked. No matter how hard I tried to fit in and play nice, I always felt like an outsider. No matter how hard I tried to convince myself that I was part of the team, I always felt like an alien staring into the window of the party. 

But the good news, I’m completely at peace with this. I don’t need a membership card to feel like a whole person. Like I belong in the world. 

The bottom line is, I have a thriving interpersonal life with friends that I love and colleagues that I trust and family that I cherish. I have multiple centers of belonging that create meaning in my life. And that’s enough for me. 

Carlin said it best. Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name. And if you must join, and they tell you that you're not a team player, congratulate them on being observant. 

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How does your definition of belonging differ from the rest of the world?

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* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
Author. Speaker. Strategist. Inventor. Filmmaker. Publisher. Songwriter.  
scott@hellomynameisscott.com
www.nametagscott.com


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