Sunday, January 14, 2007

4 Communication Confidence Builders

Confident communication comes from winning small victories first. Here are 4 techniques to help you gain the edge...

1. Avoid starting your responses or conversations with hedging phrases and immediate personal discounters. These fillers give off the impression the you're hiding behind your words and refusing to commit. They also have the power to negate whatever you say next. Examples include:

“I was just going to say…”
“I’m not sure if I’m right, but…”
“I don’t know if…”
“This is probably a stupid question…”

State your point confidently. No need to add extra words.

2. Take yourself on a date ALONE. Go to a fun place. Act like a real date. This will build your confidence and boost feelings of independence. (I do this at least once a month - it's the best!)

3. Use self-disclosure openings as conversation starters. They ease communication apprehension, offer insight into you and appeal to the inherent helpful nature of other people. Examples include:

“Hi, I don’t know anybody here!”
“This is my first time here.”
“I’ve never been to Dallas before.”

4. Avoid the word “interested.” It doesn’t have the confidence and persuasion of “willing.” It also uses more active language because it removes an “-ing” suffix from the sentence. For example, which of the following questions sound more confident?

“Dave, would you be interested in giving me your email?”
“Dave, would you be willing to give me your email?”

What's your best confidence builder?

Make the list grow! Post your confidence builders here.

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Scott Ginsberg
Author/Speaker/That Guy with the Nametag

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