Monday, April 10, 2006

If you don't smile, they won't believe you

4:40 AM 5 comments

During a recent speech at a Prudential conference in Minneapolis, we spent some time talking about the value (and practice) of smiling. And I was thinking to myself, Am I beating a dead horse? Is the topic of smiling completely overdone?

No way.


This particular picture (thanks Ryan, those black & whites look great!), captured a moment when I introduced myself to someone in the audience. I shook his hand, offered my name and said, "Nice to meet you."

...without smiling.


It was hard to keep a straight face! But in so doing I think the message was clear: if you don't smile when you say "nice to meet you," people won't believe you.

Too many businesspeople STILL don't get it: smiling is the number one indicator that conversation is desirable. What's more, according to a 2004 CNN.com poll of 1,500 registered voters, "A smile is the leading indicator of a person's approachability."

But alas, common sense is not common practice. So, here are my tips:

  • Humans have a natural tendency to evaluate others upon an entrance. So, use this opportunity to project approachability to all who watch: smile for the first ten seconds ever time you walk into a room. Make everyone think, Hmmm...wonder what she's so happy about? or Hey, he looks like a friendly guy!

  • Read Kevin Eikenberry's post about handshakes. Good stuff.

  • Next time you order a coffee, buy a book or approach the check out counter, count how long it takes before the cashier smiles at you. If the number is more than 1.5 seconds, that's not good. In which case, you might need to smile first ;)

  • Smile when you say goodbye. After all, sometimes the best FIRST impression is a LAST impression.

    LET ME ASK YA THIS...

    Is smiling overdone or underused?

    * * * *
    Scott Ginsberg
    Author/Speaker/That guy with the nametag
    www.hellomynameisscott.com

    • 5 comments:

    Yeah, pretty sure I don't think that smiling can be overdone. If it can, I think I'm guilty of it.


    ....as are you.

    Show some teeth!

    This was a lesson I learned from personal experience. Feedback from my peers in public speaking class indicated that what I thought was a smile was being interpreted as a smirk.

    So, I began a personal nonverbal communication experiment in eye contact and smiling. After a lot of practice I learned that a big ole toothy grin is less ambiguous and more often than not gets a return smile and an exchange of pleasantries.

    I do think it is important to smile. If you want a good exercise, just make eye contact and smile to people walking down the street. It makes me feel better to greet people and surprises people who are greeted.

    Much better than staring at the sidewalk.

    Great advice! I just met with a potential client yesterday who shook my hand without smiling at all, and it really put me off the whole meeting.

    Hopefully I made a better impression on him.

    Smile! It's never overdone. As Dutch said, show some teeth. And show some sparkle in your eyes!

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